You might be experiencing

• Increased resentment that is driving a wedge in your relationship
• Feeling stuck when it comes to particular sensitive conversations or past hurts
• Feeling like no matter how many different ways you’ve tried to explain what you feel or need, your partner just isn’t getting it and you’re starting to worry that they never will
• Something feels off between you, but you can’t quite put a finger on what is wrong
• Thinking everything should feel ok, but you just aren’t happy together the way you used to be and don’t know what to do about it
• Having a hard time moving past an emotional or physical betrayal and don’t even know where to start to move forward
  
  

What’s actually happening

Most distress in a relationship doesn’t come from what’s on the surface but rather the underlying patterns in the relationship that lead to emotional distance, resentment, and disconnect. When couples think about “fixing” their relationship, they often look to the immediately obvious conflicts. While solving these surface level conflicts can help relieve tension in the relationship in the short term, they do not address root issues that are causing the distress. These deeper patterns such as how we communicate and relate to each others’ emotions, and how we respond when we feel hurt, overwhelmed, or disconnected are what drive relationship dissatisfaction. 

How therapy helps

Many people assume that couples therapy is just an hour set aside to dive into conflict. On the contrary, couples therapy seeks to build trust and move past the surface level conflict to help couples unearth the deep wounds that cause defensiveness, criticism, anxiety, and disconnection in the relationship. Couples therapy can help you discover the engines that drive your protective mechanisms and regain trust to guide you into the decades to come. Couples therapy is about shifting from surviving to thriving in your relationship and can help you identify and understand your relational patterns, reduce defensiveness and escalation, rebuild connection, and effectively communicate with less criticism and more understanding and respect.

My approach

I utilize Gottman Method Couples Therapy, a highly researched and evidence-based approach to treating couples in distress. The Gottman Method takes into account the entire relationship, not just the parts that feel hard. This method has been shown to address core relationship issues, heal relational trauma, improve conflict strategies, and boost communication skills to maximize effectiveness. 

What this work can lead to

Gottman Method Couples Therapy can lead to a more secure relationship, more productive communication, stronger emotional connection and trust, more effective repair after conflict, and increased intimacy. If your relationship feels stuck or strained, couples therapy can help.